Chris Douridas

Music Director, Host Morning Becomes Eclectic

Ruth was everything to us. Our matriarch. Our guiding light. You know how as you become an adult, you sort of build your own satellite family out of the people you work with, people in your circle, people around you -- especially if you're in an adopted city away from your real family as so many of us in Los Angeles are. Well for us, for me - in many ways, Ruth was our mother. But I always wondered what shaped her vision of KCRW...

Ruth had two kids. She lost David, her only son, in 1982 after a long illness. He was 25. She never really shared her grief with any of us. I only ever knew about it by hearing whispers about it from others. Shortly after I started at KCRW in 1990, as Music Director and host of MBE, I also had two kids. Ruth showered them with love. Christmas presents, birthday greetings. Her office was always open to them.

In 2006, I lost my only daughter, Marieke. She was 14. Weeks later Ruth invited me over to her house. Said she wanted to talk to me. Ruth was 71 at the time. She lived in a very modest two-bedroom house a couple blocks from the station. She sits me down. Takes my hands in hers and looks me deep in the face. She says—"Your life is forever changed. You cannot go back to the life you lived before. And you will find a way to honor your daughter in your own small way. You will.” I said to her: “What did you do?” She said, “Well I remember it very clearly. I was in Greece. Sitting on the veranda looking out at the sea. I had just been offered a job, was considering taking a job, running a tiny little radio station in Santa Monica...no audience, no signal to speak of, but full of possibilities.” 

I couldn't believe it. 

I said, "Ruth. I have always been honored to be a part of KCRW. But to now know that I have been part of your honoring your son all these years. I can't believe it." I said to her, "Why haven't you told anybody this?" She looked at me and said very simply, "It's for me."